We Write Brilliant Rhyme that is Sublime All the Time! Thursday

We Write Brilliant Rhyme that is Sublime All the Time! Thursday        Day 33

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The Poetry Contest

I hope to be able to announce the winners of the poetry contest on Sunday but I can’t guarantee that, as it is taking some time to go through each poem and give it due diligence in judging. I am so impressed with the quality of the poems submitted. I have had to disqualify a few poems because the author didn’t include 3/5 senses in their poem. I have had a few people ask why this was one of the requirements…First of all, it helped to eliminate poems that weren’t written specifically for this contest. It also isn’t an easy task and I wanted to challenge you. It is rewarding to see how cleverly you added 3 senses into your poems.

Please don’t contact me asking if your poem was disqualified. Unfortunately, I don’t have time to address your specific poem and will not be able to answer those emails.

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Overall, I think one area of improvement could be the use of multi-syllabic rhyming words…really search the rhyming dictionary for the absolute best word choices! It is very obvious in a contest like this to see who did! Use those clever, unexpected rhyming words in your picture books to keep the reader guessing. You don’t want them to be able to predict anything! It has been so much fun reading your poems and I thank each and everyone of you who is participating! Good Luck!

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Critique Groups Open to New Members

We are opening up critique groups again in the Facebook Group! If you are interested in joining an organized RhyPiBoMo Critique Group, please contact Dawn Young on Facebook or comment on the post concerning the groups. The window for adding new members will only be open for a week so please contact us asap!

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I found today’s guest blogger when I was searching for information on rhyming! She has a wonderful resource that I suggest called Rhyme Like the Experts. Here is the link to her blog where it can be purchased:http://jackiehoskingpoetry.wordpress.com/

She is a well written and respected poet who has published poetry all over the world.  She recently announced that her debut rhyming picture book coming out this July. She also offers an editing service and is the editor of Pass It On, an e-zine for writers and illustrators. See, I told you she was busy!

 

So, without further ado, I’m honored to present today’s

Golden Quill Guest Blogger

Jackie Hosking!

   Rhypibomo Guest Blogger Badge   Jackie Hosking 1

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DOES METER MATTER?

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As far as I’m concerned, without meter nothing matters!!..

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So what exactly is meter?

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Meter is the pattern created by the ordering of stressed and unstressed syllables in a line of verse. It is the rhythm of our language, the drum beat that rocks the poem along. It should be predictable and so established right from the start. This allows the reader to relax – it’s a bit like jogging. Once the rhythm is established you can jog for miles! Without this predictable rhythm the reader will trip up which will pull them out of the story or poem while they try to adjust to the new rhythm..

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A COMMON MISTAKE
Altering where the stress falls naturally to fit the meter
Song writers do this quite often but it doesn’t seem as jarring when there is music to go along with the words. Poetry is different, especially poetry that is designed to be read by people other than the author.
When we learn to speak a language we are taught to pronounce words according to where their stresses fall. Different accents will sometimes stress different parts of the word.

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Eg: the word ‘paprika’ in English/Australian is pronounced PAprika, with the stress falling on the first syllable. In the USA it is pronounced paPRIka, with the stress falling on the middle syllable.
If I was looking to rhyme with the word paprika, I could use either ‘Africa’ or ‘eureka’ depending on which country I was writing for. This is one of the reasons why it is difficult to translate poetry across countries even if they speak English.

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Here’s another eg:
I tipped my hat and waved goodbye
And walked away with my Bonsai

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What’s wrong with this couplet? Bonsai certainly rhymes with goodbye but why doesn’t it sound right? Below is an alternative – why does this read more smoothly?

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I tipped my hat and waved goodbye
And wiped a teardrop from my eye

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Okay – here’s the secret. In natural speech the word ‘goodbye’ is made up of two syllables, ‘good’ and ‘bye’. The stress falls on the second syllable – goodBYE.

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The word ‘bonsai’ on the other hand, while also made up of two syllables, has its stressed syllable falling naturally on the first one. BONsai.

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The pattern or meter for this couplet goes like this…
I tipped my hat and waved goodbye – an unstressed syllable followed by a stressed syllable.
And walked away with my Bonsai – now we have two stressed syllables running into each other. The author is likely to adjust how they pronounce the word ‘bonsai’ and put the stress on the second syllable. They will do this instinctively when they read it aloud and will miss the discrepancy. The new reader, however will try to pronounce the word as it is spoken normally and will trip up the first time he/she reads it. A good indication of whether you have made this mistake in your own writing is to get a friend to read it aloud and note where they stumble.

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Jackie Hosking

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Bio:
Jackie is a multi published children’s writer and poet. Her rhyming poetry has appeared all over the world and her first rhyming picture book has been contracted by Walker Books Australia to be published in July 2014. Jackie is the editor of PASS IT ON (PIO), the Children’s Book Writers’ and Illustrators’ Networking e-zine and she also runs her own Rhyming Manuscript Editing Service. Users of her editing service are able to purchase a copy of her booklet ‘Rhyme Like the Experts’ for only AU$5.00

Jackie's book

*children’s author/poet
http://jackiehoskingblog.wordpress.com/
*editor – children’s rhyming manuscripts
http://jackiehoskingblog.wordpress.com/jackies-editing-service/
*publisher of PASS IT ON
http://jackiehoskingpio.wordpress.com/

 

 

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Thank you Jackie Hosking!

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RhyPiBoMo Daily Lesson: Thursday, May 1

By Angie Karcher © 2014
Lesson 33

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Is your Rhyme Brilliant?

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When I began thinking about today’s blog I asked myself,
“What does BRILLIANT mean?”

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Here are a few synonyms:
Shining brightly
Sparkling
Glittering
Lustrous
Distinguished
Having great intelligence
Talented
Quality
Strong and clear in tone
Vivid
Bright
Illustrious
Splendid
Magnificent

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These words describe so much about this past month spent learning more about our love for writing rhyme together.

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First of all, I am overwhelmed with the gratitude I feel from everyone. It has been my pleasure to share my journey with you…it’s so much more fun to study with friends!

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Secondly, these descriptive words apply to how brilliant our writing will be if we keep at it! I hope you will keep the daily lessons saved where you can refer to them often. There was A LOT of information…go back when you have time and do the writing prompts, click on the resources and read it all again without the pressure of daily intensity.

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Thirdly, continue to submit your work to your critique group, continue to do the word chopping exercises we learned and add in all the poetic devices your manuscript can handle without feeling like a sinking poetic ship! Don’t do them all in one manuscript…choose the gems that will make it sparkle and glimmer on its way to publication!

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If you notice that your writing starts to seem a bit:
cloudy
dim
dull
gloomy
obscure
dulled
normal
typical
Then it’s time to get your sparkle back! Pull out the RhyPiBoMo Notebook!

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I have a few requests of you…

RhyPiBoMo Graduate Badge
1) Please post this RhyPiBoMo Graduate Badge on your website and blog and link it back to my blog at Angiekarcher.wordpress.com You have earned this well-deserved badge of honor for doing the work, and for sticking it out with me! Please tell other rhymers about your experience here! If I could figure out a way to make this badge sparkle, I would have done it! You should be able to grab it (copy and paste) from here and I also have it on the sidebar of my blog. Here is the image link:

https://angiekarcher.files.wordpress.com/2014/05/rhypibomo-graduate-badge-e1398926047783.jpg

 

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2) Please promise that if you have a rhyming picture book published from here on out that you will let me know!!! I want to celebrate with you and share your brilliant accomplishment with the world! I want to create a plaque listing the names of the RhyPiBoMo published authors that were published after this month.

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3) I would absolutely LOVE for you to send me an autographed copy of your rhyming picture book once it is published. I will share it in future events and brag on you…say that I knew you before you were a big time author! LOL! I will post your book on my wall of authors on my blog!

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4) I hope that you will continue to read rhyming picture books every day and I hope that you will continue to write poetry too. Poetry is the secret ingredient to our rhyming picture book cakes that will make it delicious and keep kids and parents asking for more. Anyone who says poetry isn’t important in this genre…is wrong! Of course, it’s not about knowing the terminology, it’s about understanding the concepts and how they will make your text shine! Anyone who has published a genuinely brilliant and singing rhyming picture book is writing poetry, whether they know it or not.

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The difference between brilliant rhyme and mediocre rhyme is the difference between publishing an award winning, acclaimed rhyming picture book and one that is published but collects dust on the shelf…no one reads it more than once.

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Remember, I am on this journey with you as I have not published a rhyming picture book yet…but I am working on that! My biggest challenge has always been…sending out submissions. Isn’t that stupid that I write but I don’t submit very often. I go in spurts, typically after attending a writing conference, where I submit several manuscripts at a time and then I get caught up in some other writing endeavor and don’t continue the pattern.

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I am so motivated now to revise a few of my rhyming picture book manuscripts and submit…Maybe we should announce submissions on the Facebook Group as a motivation! Let me think about what we can do to help motivate submissions on a regular basis. We will talk about submitting more on Saturday!

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Writing Prompt: Use as many of the descriptive synonyms of brilliant as you can in a poem to describe your writing!

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Okay, now do everything else on the pledge for today and don’t forget to comment on today’s blog post!

RhyPiBoMo Pledge

RhyPiBoMo PledgeRhyPiBoMo Pledge Please comment ONLY ONE TIME below for a chance to win today’s prize! Prizes will be drawn by Random.com next Sunday for the previous week. To be eligible for a prize you must be a registered participant and comment after each days lessons.

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66 thoughts on “We Write Brilliant Rhyme that is Sublime All the Time! Thursday

  1. Loved Jackie Hosking’s nuggets and know I have been guilty of changing up stressed syllables to suit my needs. You are such a fine educator Angie, repeating and repeating what is so necessary to learn for our success.

  2. Thanks Angie, for all the work you’ve done, compiling the lessons, guests, prizes, etc (I knew there’s etc!!!) These posts are worthy of repeat…perhaps one a month, or so! Jackie, thanks for adding to this.

  3. To celebrate I did it all,
    I’ll place the badge upon my Wall.

    Thanks, Angie for yet another post to help us tune up our rhyme to make it shine!

    Jackie, let us know when your book hits the market this July! I’m looking forward to reading it 😀

  4. I have benefited from Jackie’s brilliant rhyming expertise in the past and can highly recommend it. Thanks Angie for all your effort and knowledge you have shared during this wonderful challenge.

  5. Thanks Angie and Jackie for the tips today. Now, I’m off to write a brilliant rhyme with perfect meter!

  6. Hi Angie!

    I have really enjoyed RHyPiBoMo! Thanks for your time and effort!

    I am I’m the Zella critique group and it looks like only me and one other member are interested in continuing.

    How do we go about joining a new group?

    Thanks!

    Sent from my iPhone

    • Hi Karen, Dawn is in the process of adding people to groups so sit tight for now…this may take a week or so to get things settled. I’m happy you can stay!
      Angie

  7. My rhyme and rhythm is FAR from brilliant! I look forward to continuing what I have learned this month from you, Angie, and all the guest bloggers. Jackie’s post today really hit home with me.

  8. Fabulous advice from Jackie on stressing sylLAbles/SYLlables/syllaBLES!

    Can’t wait to dig into the contest entries on Sunday and read the fabulous work of my fellow RhyPiBoMoers!

  9. And the badge is already up on my blog (Even though we have two days left LOL). Great stuff, Angie! so enjoying this – and I will DEFINITELY be back to review these often!

  10. I love Jackie’s comparison of reading to jogging. It was very apt, getting in the groove and feeling the rhythm is uber important to both. And, thanks to Angie, I’m sure most if not all of us will be feeling the beat by the end of RhyPiBoMo.

  11. I am confused. Though I write songs and poetry, I fear I am stress deaf. BUT Jackie, I am not sure your stress example of goodbye and bonsai is convincing. I agree goodbye sounds like goodBYE. Bonsai sounds like bonSAI to me. Not BONsai. Is there someplace online where I can find more examples of stressed syllables. My mind is strained.

  12. Thank you for all your hard work, Angie! This experience has made a difference in my writing and motivation! It has also made a difference in my life! Thanks to RhyPiBiMo, I am proud to be a member of an absolutely wonderful and talented critique group–the Goodnight Moons. I have printed out all of the lessons and placed them in a binder so that I can review them as needed. I will also reread them online for the clickable links and resources. Thanks again, Angie! 🙂

  13. Working on a chapter book last night, meter mattered during a character’s run. Ahhhh, the rewards never stop.

  14. Thanks for the great post. I have had that problem with end rhymes and the words being stressed in the wrong way. They look like they should rhyme, but it never sounds right when read out loud.

  15. I’m in the same boat, Janet. It’s something I need to work on.

    I’ve saved the graduate badge to my computer since I don’t have a blog yet. When I do I will post in with pride 🙂

  16. It’s all been said – I won’t repeat
    With rhyme you have to get the beat
    And using words of quality
    That sparkle with frivolity
    The tone must be both strong and clear
    So all the children listening cheer
    Revising till each line can glitter
    Be tenacious, not a quitter
    With talent and determination
    Watch each word’s pronunciation
    With shining verses that are vivid
    Or Angie Karcher will be livid
    With thanks and love I do decree
    RhyPiBoMo rocks – don’t you agree?

    Angie, this was the most fun! I’ve learned so much about poetry and writing rhyming picture books. Thanks to all the guest bloggers for sharing their expertise. I’m looking forward to working with my awesome Goodnight Moons over the next couple of months…and then meeting new friends to critique with. 🙂

  17. Submitting is a problem for me too, Angie. I revise, and revise, and revise, and . . . well you get the picture.

  18. A month of RhyPiBoMo and I find myself seeing the world in terms of rhyme and meter…
    Thanks for all the inspiration, motivation, and lack-of-vacation from writing on a daily basis!

    Looking forward to reading the Sunday poetry paper!

  19. Thanks, Angie, and Jackie, too. Good point about pronunciation–I noticed that I was pronouncing it hot AIR balloon when I wrote my story, and others read it as hot air bal LOON, so it did make a difference in the rhythm, and I ended up ditching that stanza. It was good to read 30 rhyming PB–some excellent, and some surprisingly weak! Thanks for all your hard work, Angie–excellent job!

  20. I plan on putting the badge on my brand new blog ASAP. I will be debuting my new blog in a few days! Thanks for the inspiration and great lessons.

  21. Great post by Jackie! I particularly enjoyed the “paprika” example; I’ve got to get that word into a poem now. It’s been a fun month, Angie, and thanks for all your hard work and encouragement. You raise a very important point about submissions and motivation – my goal for the summer is to get going on submissions.

  22. Thank you, Jackie, for the sage advice about meter and the mistakes commonly made. I need to pay better attention!

    Angie, thank you for the graduation badge. I have it posted proudly on my website with a link back to your website. I appreciate your hard work and the care you have shown each of us during this amazing journey into the world of rhyme and rhythm. I look forward to participating in future RhyPiBoMo events.

  23. Thank you, Jackie. You are the maven of mighty meter matters! Gotta go grab that badge and post it. Thanks, Angie. I hope you’re feeling better!

  24. I’ve won two reviews- one from Angie and one from Jackie. I have two manuscripts, but need to work on one. I look forward to hearing your thoughts. I am looking forward to commencement when I can add the initials after my name, PHD, Poet– Hoping, Determinedly

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